It's Been a Week...

A week ago, I was kicking back on the beach in Santa Barbara.  Oh my, how I wish I were there right now.  It almost feels as if I need another one of those weekends.  I think I do.

I haven't had a chance to write and even right now, there is a hamper full of laundry waiting to be washed, 3 loads of clean clothes that need folding, a bedroom and bathroom that need cleaning, a salad that needs to be made for tonight's BBQ and 2 kids who both are not falling asleep. 

Yet here I am, taking a moment for me.  Lovely.

2 days after Ryder cut his first tooth, he cut his second.  Exactly the same as Kai did, only 2 weeks earlier.  He is about to venture out in crawling territory, but the kid is so incredibly top heavy (23 lbs. at almost 7 months of age, wearing 24M. clothes) that he has a hard time getting himself in motion.  It's funny to see.  It reminds me of Kai at this age.  He hardly crawled and went straight to walking.  I have a suspicion that Ryder might do the same.

Other than that, he is loving his solids.  I find myself so much more laid back with him than I was with Kai.  As much as I would love to start making my own baby food (all organic, just like I did with Kai), it is just too much at the moment.  Besides that, my freezer is popping out of its seams as it is, as it is filled with frozen breast milk, which leaves hardly any space for the grown-up food, let alone frozen baby food.  As soon as he can, Ryder is going to enjoy our 'human' table food as I am already soo done with the jarred version.  However, in the 2 years between the two kids, Earths Best has come out with a ton of new flavors, which makes this process just a tad more exciting.  If not for the baby, then at least for mom.

On Wednesday Kai finally made it to the dentist.  All went well; everyone (including dad and the dentist) survived and Kai walked away with a cool robot and a Sesame Street electric toothbrush.  The pay-off for him?  Ice -cream.  Something he made sure he reminded daddy of all the time while he was in the dentist chair...gives a good impression on our parenting doesn't it?  Except for the bedtime sippy, we are now a sippy-cup-free-house and are transitioning to regular cups.  Obviously, this leaves mommy mopping and cleaning a bit more than she would like.

These days naps are hit or miss for Kai.  He will gladly play by himself in his room for 2 1/2 hours after which the afternoon is usually a bit challenging as he is tired, but when he sleeps, he sleeps well.  However, he tends to prefer the floor over his bed.  Really?!?!  David contributed it to the fact that "he is a boy".  That's it?  Oh well, he has the choice of sleeping on the floor or his bed.  If he prefers the floor, then I assume it has something appealing his bed doesn't have.  Whatever-that-may-be.

Finally, potty training.  Or should I say "Potty Training Refusal"?  Potty training isn't really happening in this household and it looks as if we're still a long way off.  I finally got Kai to sit on his seat by giving him 1 M&M's.  I put it on the sofa.  It worked.  I put it on the toilet lid.  It worked.  I opened the lid and put in on the seat.  It didn't work.  And that's where we're stuck.  On the toilet seat.  He will not sit on it.  I can offer him the entire bag of M&M's and he still will run away screaming.  I'm seriously starting to think that maybe I'll be training both boys at the same time in a couple of years... :-0

And then there is Monday...this upcoming Monday...the day-after-tomorrow... The day that I am returning to work.  Sigh...  I'll only be teaching 1 class in the morning on Mondays - Thursdays, so it's not bad.  I'll be back by 10am, but it does mean that I will not be there 4 out of the 7 days to see Ryder's bright and smiling face when I walk into the nursery.  It'll mean that I won't be there 4 out of the 7 days to sit with Kai on the sofa while he watches Sesame Street and Curious George.  I'll miss it.  Then there is all the extra work that comes with work: grading assignments, keeping track of attendance and dealing with students who think they don't deserve a certain grade.  Ah, the things we get to look forward to as the Fall semester fast approaches.

On that note, I am going back to my housework.  Kids are still not sleeping, so who knows how long I actually have until all hell breaks loose and they request their immediate release from either crib or train table.

Oh, and the Friday Faves...they'll be back next week.  I am sorry for skipping this week, but with this only being half of what happened this week, I just didn't get to it.

Welcome Home Mommy!

Our Mom's Weekend Out was a big enough success that there are already ideas going around about the next one.  The next time I've been gone for a few days, however, I would prefer a slightly different welcome from my baby boy.  As warm and as loving as the initial 'welcome back' moments were, the one that followed a few hours later, in the middle of the night, wasn't quite what I had hoped for.

Despite having been gone and having had the chance to rest for the weekend, I was exhausted by the time 10pm came around.  A good night's sleep and I would be ready for Monday.  Bring it on.  My Monday this week started at 5am when Ryder woke up crying.  As a mom you develop the ability to translate your baby's cries and though I was pretty darn good at it back in the day with Kai (these days it's a different story), I had to re-learn the whole science of cry-interpretation with Ryder.  You'd think I didn't get enough practice in with Kai, but trust me I did.  I think this was purely a case of selective memory.

So, 5am comes around and Ryder is up.  This time not with the kind of fussing that will stop, after which he'll fall asleep again.  It was a different cry.  One that told me, to go in and check on him.  And there I went.  Stumbling down the hall, into his room.  A little voice in the back of my head said: "check if he's hungry" and so I did by gently sticking me finger into his mouth. 

And bingo!!  There it was...!!

The cause of all evil.

The beginning of the end of baby-hood.

A tooth.

His first tooth.

Right at that moment my heart stopped.  I had dreaded this moment for so long and here it was.  It had come out of nowhere, with no lead in time (other than 3 months of drool, drool and more drool, but hey, drool doesn't mean much to me anymore).  At that very moment, at 5am on Monday morning, my baby made me realize (even more) that he was growing up. 

Given the fact that we are most likely not going to have any more children, that meant that the gummy smiles were gone.  Forever.  I loved them so much and it broke my heart to think that this was it.  That the last time I saw him smile, had been the last time I had seen his gummy smile.  I love gummy smiles.  And though the smiles with teeth are absolutely just as precious, there is something so very special about the gummy ones.  At least to me.

Some topical gel and Ibuprofen later, Ryder rolled over, cuddled with his blankie and went straight back to sleep.  Calm, soothed, and happy.

Mommy, on the other hand, let loose a few tears before she fell asleep.  It had been a bittersweet return home.  I am absolutely blessed and happy that my baby boy is healthy and is turning into a 'big' boy, however I am sad that yet another chapter of 'infancy' has been closed and is now behind me.  I loved his gummy smile and I just wasn't ready to let it go quite yet.  This just proves, once again, that our children grow up on their own terms.  As parents we do so much to encourage and support their growth, however, at the same time there is nothing we can do as they just do it on their own.

This feeling is similar to the one I had when I realized that Ryder wasn't falling asleep in my arms anymore. I know that these moments will be replaced by new ones that in turn will be just as precious, yet I cannot help but be a bit sad. 

Thank you Ryder, for reminding me to really live in the moment and to experience every single moment fully.  They are precious and before we know it, they're gone, to never return again.  Afterall:

The present is a gift, that's why it's called 'The Present'.

It's Back! (And So Am I)

I couldn't find it anywhere on Friday morning.  I had spent several days looking for it and just wasn't able to locate it.  If anything, it seemed to distance itself further and further from my mommy-self.

My sanity.

I lost it.

I have found it.

And it only took a weekend with 10 dear mommy-friends, a day of doing nothing on the beach, strolling around in Santa Barbara, delicious food, lots of laughter

and a couple several okay, maybe a few x several drinks,

{My mommy-friends}

to locate it again.  The most important thing: I found it and the search was awesome!!

The tradition we started last year, was continued this year with our Moms' Weekend Out, which we spent with 11 mommies in Santa Barbara.  It was just what the doctor had ordered (or should have ordered a long time ago).

My best friend and I were the first ones to arrive Friday around 11:30am.  Just in time to start our weekend out with a nice lunch.  I think we spent about 2 hours eating, chatting and relaxing.  And guess what?  It felt foreign to us.  The lack of toddlers, babies, or the thought of "I have to be home in half an hour, I should be heading back" was just delightful.  The lunch experience by itself was so relaxing!  This was headed in the right direction - to be a very successful and relaxing weekend.

The B&B in which we stayed, offered complimentary wine and cheese from 5-7pm, which obviously was most welcome for us partay-ing mommies.  The evenings were spent going out for dinner, which varied from delicate and delicious dining on Friday eve

to letting out the carnivore in me on Saturday.

We spent the rest of both evenings in the partay-room (our room) in the B&B playing games,laughing, chatting and kicking back.

Saturday was mostly spent on the beach - it was a beautiful day, though the wind was deceiving and left me a bit redder than I would have liked :-0

We ended our Moms Weekend Out with strolling around Santa Barbara, doing a little bit of shopping on State Street and having lunch before throwing ourselves in the peak of weekend traffic heading back to Los Angeles.  Oh well, we were too relaxed to be bothered by the bumper-to-bumper driving experience.  I wonder how long I will be that relaxed - I doubt it'll last as long as I would like it to last.

The weekend was such a success that we've already started thinking about the next one.  Maybe it would be a good idea to do this twice a year?  I mean, I seriously don't see anything wrong with having a refreshed, rejuvenated, sanity-rediscovered, mom who is ready to face the daily challenges adventures (and joys) that her children throw her way with a smile on her face and calm in her heart.  (Ask me in about a week if the calm is still there...on second thought, maybe twice a year is not even enough...though I doubt that once a month would fly with the hubbies...)

And on that note: the hubby survived the weekend as well.  And so did the kids.  I am pretty sure that the hubby didn't get as much sleep as he would have liked, but it sounds like they had a lot of fun with with play dates, a trip to the zoo and swimming fun at the godparents.

Now, to find out more about the warm welcome I received from Ryder upon my return home, come back tomorrow.  That's a story in and by itself.

Friday Faves - Week 6

Happy Friday Everyone!  This time I am even more excited about the weekend: it's my long awaited and anticipated Mom's Weekend Out.  12 Mommies in Santa Barbara - how fun it'll be! 

Below is a summary of answers I got to last week's Faves.  This week's Faves are listed at the bottom, I look forward to hearing from you and reading your comments. 

Now, I might have to specify a few things:
* If you have any suggestions or ideas on which you would like people to share their favorite, let me know and I'd be more than happy to include them in one of the next week's Friday Faves.

* If you want the chance to be featured on my blog next week, go ahead and host a Friday Faves post on your own blog.  At the end of the week I will choose the winning Friday Faves post and feature it (and its author) on my blog!  Just follow these easy steps and off you go:

1. Become a follower of my blog.

2. On your blog, write a post, including anywhere from 3-5 'fill-in-the-blanks' that start with "What's your Favorite..." (you come up with your own ideas).

3. Add the Friday Faves button to your post:


<center><a href="http://mformommy.blogspot.com/search/label/Friday%20Faves"><img border="0" src="http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4150/4847535262_340caf18a7_m.jpg" /></a></center>


4. Link your post up anytime during the week while the linky below is open.  (Make sure to link up the appropriate post, not your blog home page!)
Note: Link up only when you're actually hosting a Friday Faves on your blog, please.  I will delete any spam link-ups.
At the end of the week, I will choose the 'winning' Friday Faves list of questions and feature the winning blog, its questions and their answers in my Friday Faves post.

You don't need to write a follow up post on the feedback you get from people, however, if you'd like to do that, I bet your readers would enjoy it.

So, mama's - let's get the creative juices flowing!!

Here's a run down of the feedback we got after last week's Friday Faves:

1. Favorite ice cream
When I first moved to the US, I was introduced to Ben & Jerry's Bovinity Divinity. (Milk chocolate ice cream with dark and white chocolate fudge cows)  LOVED LOVED LOVED that ice cream.  Unfortunately it got killed.  I don't know why, but I suspect it wasn't performing well enough or meeting the requirements.  It doesn't matter.  It no longer is and I am (still) heart broken.
Joey's favorite is Ben & Jerry's Phish Food.  Yummy and filled with everything yummy under the sun that can be included in ice cream.
TV's fav is anything coffee related, which reminds me, have you guys tried the Haagen Dasz Baileys Irish Cream ice cream?!?!  To die for, so yummy!


2. Favorite teething remedy for infants / toddlers
Medication-wise both Orajel (which is also popular at TV's house) and Tylenol worked well with Kai.  The Tylenol always took about 20 minutes to start working, so those 20 minutes got bridged with the Orajel.  Worked like a charm and always put him right back to sleep.  Ryder is almost dispensing as much H2O as the Niagara Falls, but luckily there are no teeth on the horizon yet (I want to hold on to his gummy smile a bit longer - mommy isn't ready for teeth yet).  The cool thing though: both boys love(d) this wooden rattle that used to belong to my dad.  Kai loved to chew on it and now Ryder is doing everything he can to chew the thing to pieces.  Love the sentiment behind it.Joey made me laugh with her response as she suggested ear plugs.  Good one, I'll remember that when we really start teething in this house.
Traci suggested a cold cloth to chew on.  Thanks for the suggestion.  For Kai it never worked, but with Ryder I hadn't thought of trying that out.  Will do so soon!


3. Favorite kid-friendly curse word
I didn't get much feedback on this one.  Am I really the only one who needs to let it out sometimes?  Really?  Well, around here I do think a lot more than I say, but when I really cannot keep my mouth shut it's usually 'darn, crap or shoot'.  - Don't ask what all goes through my mind sometimes.....:-0


4. Favorite at home spa treatment
Similarly to Traci, my favorite at home spa treatment is a facial.  I start out by cleansing it with my Dermalogica cleansing gel, followed by a scrub.  I have a facial steamer that really opens up the pores and then the clay facial mask from The Body Shop.  Let it dry up for about 10 minutes at which point you cannot move a muscle in your face without the mask cracking all over.  When you clean your face with lukewarm water and then moisturize it, it not only feels great, but it also looks refreshed.  The following morning I always think I look 5 years younger.  Maybe that's wishful thinking, but hey, it works for me!
For both Joey and TV the favorite at home spa treatment is a pedicure.  Ah, the joy of soft feet, callus free, nicely polished toes, pretty and ready to be shown off in sandals.  I hear you on that one girlfriends!!  (It'd be even better if we could get our hubby's to massage the lotion in to get them not only soft, but also relaxed....;-)


5. Favorite book
Oh, how our life changes when we have kids.  For many of us our favorite book is a book that our children enjoy.  I have to admit that I don't read much myself, but...for this weekend I actually bought a book that sounded so fascinating: "Like Water for Chocolate" by Laura Esquivel - a novel about pouring your heart and soul into your cooking and all that this can lead to.  I can't wait to read it on the beach this weekend.

For next week, I would love to hear about your Favorite:

1. ... kid's lunch

2. ... baby proofing item
3. ... exercise music (3 songs)
4. ... stain remover (for the toughest stains)

5. ... clothing brand

Have a great weekend everyone!

My Toddler is Off

Yes, that's right: my toddler is off.

No, he's not past his expiration date, nor does he smell funny.  He is off as in, he's not the normal toddler.  I had a suspicion, but as of today I have decided that it's a fact.

"Why?" you ask?  Well, let me tell you:
I made brownies today.  Yummy brownies.  Okay, I admit, I experimented a bit with the recipe, but they came out great.  Nooooo!!!!!  I know what you're thinking!  They were NOT space cakes!!  It wasn't that kind of experimenting, okay?!  Really, do you think I would do that to my toddler?  Well, if you knew my toddler and saw him at times you'd think I did spice up his food with something energizing, but no, I did NOT.

No, I actually got the recipe out of the "Deceptively Delicious" cookbook by Jessica Seinfeld.  The brownies contain 1/2 cup of carrot and 1/2 cup of spinach puree.  Now, I know that you're frowning while reading this, but hey, I'm up for trying things out.  So I did.  And honestly, I have had my fair share of brownies and these are actually pretty good.  A bit more moist than your average brownie, but full of chocolate flavor.  I cannot taste the veggies in them.  Absolutely not.

As I said, they came out great.  Not as high as I would have liked, but the recipe called for an 8" brownie pan and I only had a 9" - hence the height difference.

I baked them during nap time, the house smelled like freshly baked goodies (I love that smell) and the recipe called for letting them cool completely before enjoying them.  That was the hard part.  BUT...by the time I woke Kai up from his nap, they were cooled and ready to be eaten. 

So, I tell Kai I have a treat for him, give him the brownie, he takes a little bite and...spits it out!!!  He spits out the brownie!!  My toddler just spit out a freakin' brownie, one that oozes chocolate flavor!! What the heck?  Aren't toddlers supposed to like this kinda stuff?  I swear, my toddler is off.

Sigh, now I have to eat them myself...oh well...

Dentist and Ice Cream Please!

{Sept. '08 - Kai at 7 Months old}

Kai was supposed to have his first dentist appointment yesterday.  An appointment I dreaded going to, so this was one that got passed over to dad.  You betcha I wasn't going with him!  Now, this decision was by no means affected by my lack of love for dentists, but rather by Kai's strong temperament, combined with the fact that, if I want to look in his mouth, I will have to be prepared to get my fingers bitten off.  No, that's not the kid I want to take to the dentist.  He's a daddy's boy to begin with, so all that makes this little excursion perfect for father and son.

David was at work Sunday night, so while I was brushing Kai's teeth, I explained to him what was going to happen the next morning.  I told him about the dentist, that she would look in his mouth and clean his teeth, etc.  All the while he was nodding, delighting me with the thought that he might actually understand what I was saying.  ('Cause these days I sometimes wonder what he does and does not understand.)  So when I was done explaining, I concluded by sharing that they would go for ice cream if he'd be a good boy at the dentist.  (As per the agreement daddy and I had).  Yes, sometimes we default to some good ol' conditional parenting.  Can't live without it :-0

As I mentioned, we were supposed to have the dentist appointment on Monday morning.  That Sunday eve, after the kids were down, David called me from work with the news that he had a last minute meeting come up at 9am, so that he wouldn't be able to take Kai to his 8am checkup.  Long story short, I called the office, left a message canceling the appointment while apologizing profusely and asking them to call me back to reschedule this joyous event.

Monday came and went.  Kai didn't mention the dentist and I was convinced he'd forgotten about it.  So, fast forward to tonight and imagine my surprise when all of a sudden, in the midst of brushing our teeth, Kai pushes the tooth brush out and says: "Mommy, dentist and ice cream please!!"

Ha!  I guess he listened, understood and remembered.  I am amazed by the fact that he did, but I think it is largely due to the fact that ice cream was involved in the explanation.  Simply, because there are things that I have explained over and over and over again and he still doesn't seem to (want to) get (it).  Ah, the joys of selective listening and selective memory.  I wish that I could get away with it the way he does.

Mama & Son Day Out

When I went on maternity leave stopped working (don't even get me started on the distinction there!!) in December, I was lucky to be able to spend several weeks with Kai before Ryder joined us on Feb. 1.  Those weeks, spent together with Kai were amazing.  I had been working part time up until then, but the early mornings (which is when I was at work) was almost when he was in the 'bestest' of moods and would always crave that parental bonding time.  I missed out on that for so long, but for those few weeks up to Ryder's arrival were beautiful weeks - weeks in which Kai and I grew so much closer and had so much fun.

Now that he is a big brother, he not only has a new play mate, but he also has to share.  Share toys, share time and most challenging: share attention.  So, I decided that it was time that Kai and I were going to have some Mama & Kai time.  And yesterday was that day.

A few days ago, he overheard me talking to my best friend when I said "we'll either go to the zoo or the beach, I'll let him decide".  From that moment on, he was all about "Kai and Mama go to zoo and see wild animals!"  For 2 days straight.  Every chance he had.  I guess we were going to the zoo.

We had such a fun time.  It was warm, but it was fun.  We started out at the petting zoo.  For the first few minutes, he was so excited about petting and brushing the goats and the sheep that all he did was run in circles and jump up and down.  When he finally calmed down, the petting and brushing started.

We covered the entire zoo, but the zebras and the giraffes were the big favorites. 

We had lunch and no, it wasn't healthy, but it sure was fun as Kai thoroughly enjoyed double dipping his fries in first the mayonnaise, followed by ketchup, followed by (my favorite) the mayo-ketchup combination. 

And then...[drum roll]: his first soft ice cream cone.

He loved the ice cream.  The cone not so much, but oh well, Mama was happy to help with that.

He even shared this ice cream:

Other than that, we strolled around, played on the play ground, stood under the mist-dispensing-showery-thingies to then cover ourselves with dirt and wood snips, ensuring Mama had some laundry to do upon our return home.

And when we did come home, we were so jacked up on sugar and overflowing with energy that the word 'nap' was momentarily erased from our memory.  We Kai had no clue what it meant, what it stood for or what he was supposed to do with it.  Mama, on the contrary, did have a clue, however, didn't have a chance to execute it.  Oh well.  It was a great day.  Absolutely worth it.