Summer 2011 - The Second Half (August)

And for a change, I start by writing about me: August was great. I started working out with my personal trainer and am loving it. Though there are sessions where he seriously kills me slowly and steadily, it feels awesome to be back in the gym. AND in my new, size 2 jeans. [insert big grin] The day that I went shopping for new Fall clothes and I tried on the size 4 jeans, they were too wide. Wahoo, Hallelujah, praise Xavier (my trainer).

To continue the whole “health” thing, I signed up for an organic veggie & fruit service: once a week I pick up a crate filled with fresh, organic (pesticide & fungicide free) seasonal fruits and veggies, grown by local farmers.

Thank you Jamie Oliver and your Food Revolution for inspiring me! It is exciting as a box may very well contain items that I otherwise would not buy at the store, thus pushing my experimental cooking boundaries. I’m loving it. We’ve discovered some awesome new dishes already :-)

On August 15, I wrote on my Facebook: “Laundry, cleaning, sorting, tidying, organizing, children, swimming lessons, cooking - Just another Monday.” That’s what the average August day looked like. And thus, as busy moms, we once in a while deserve a little down time. Mine came in the form of a wine and cheese evening with mommy friends. Everyone brought her favorite wine, paired with a cheese. The result? A fun-filled evening with lots of laughter.

Ah, and then there was “MWO 2011”, or in other words: “Mom’s Weekend Out 2011” – the annual tradition of our mommy group, established in 2009. In 2009 we rented a house in Palm Springs and had a wild time. In 2010 we spent a weekend in Santa Barbara and had a laid back time. This year we went to the Glen Ivy Hot Springs and had a soothing and relaxing time:

First things first: there are items that need to remain chilled in the hotel room’s fridge.

The rest of the weekend was filled with delicious foods, drinks, mud, and great company:

Enough about me. On to the children.

Kai discovered something new and fun: walking on Mommy’s back. He loved it. I loved it. Match made in Heaven.

One Sunday we had a Kai & Mommy morning. For the first time in both our lives we ventured out and explored LA’s public transportation…

Yes, we took the bus and the subway to Hollywood and Highland where we walked around, enjoyed ice cream and played in the fountain.

Fun, Fun, Fun!

Oh yeah, and this month marked the first time of Kai announcing that I was a “Rock Star Mommy”. AWESOME!

After 8 weeks of intense work play, the gymnastic classes came to an end.

And after 14 swim classes the day finally arrived that things clicked for Kai. All of a sudden he “got it” and the resistance had had up to that point vanished:

Out of nowhere he swam half way across the pool - by himself, face in the water, eyes open.

He LOVED it. From that moment on, all I heard was "I want to swim more, I want to swim more".

I could not be prouder of my boy. Needless to say, swim lessons ended on a great note this year and we are both looking forward to next year’s classes.

August also “celebrated” the day when I officially announced that I now officially had “two children who are capable of throwing tantrums”. It was one of those afternoons where temperatures forced you into the mall. So, we went. As most malls, this one had a fountain – a point of gravity for most children under the age of 5 and thus also for mine. Though Kai got it, Ryder didn’t quite accept the “don’t jump in the fountain” warning from me. Oh, the scene that followed… (Use your imagination – I’m sure you’ll do just fine)

At his 18 month check up this month, Ryder weighed in at 33lbs. 9 oz. and he measured 36” long. That was the max on the “baby” measuring table. At 18 months he had outgrown the pediatrician’s baby-measuring table. Bless his appetite.

By the way, the boys are letting their Dutch heritage shine through – happy me: they both became fascinated [strike through] obsessed with putting money in their piggy banks. We actually bought one of those clear plastic banks for Kai, the one with a “slide”: you put the money in, it zigzags down and each coin falls in the appropriately sized chute. I remember always wanting one of those when I was a kid, so when we found this one – in the shape of a jukebox – I just had to buy it for Kai. Ryder too, loves LOVES getting his hand on change. He’ll run to this room, do everything he can to pull his ceramic piggy bank off the shelf, put it on the ground, and put his money in. Very concentrated. Once the money is in, he claps in his hands and gets the biggest grin on his face. Yes, they’re half Dutch. Awesome.

And last but not least: there was the boys’1/2-year birthday bash. Given that their actual birthdays are in February and we have more friends than we can have inside, the kids’ party takes place in August, when everyone can be outside and there is plenty of room for everyone to run, jump, swing, play, eat and drink.

It was a fun day with tons of yummy foods and drinks,

,a great Lightning McQueen & Mater birthday cake with waaayyyy too much food coloring,

tons of kids running around on too much sugar, a bouncy castle

and a whole lot of fun.

And so, the 2nd half of summer comes to an end. It was a great month, with tons of excitement and fun – for all of us.

My Dearest Kai

My Dearest Kai,

As I am starting to write this, I don't even know exactly how this letter is going to unfold.  The main point that I am trying to make is to tell you that I love you with all my heart.  I have never been more scared than yesterday and the events that unfolded will be with me for a long, long time to come.  Let me start out by saying that I am very grateful that you are okay.

Because Daddy was away for 3 days, Mommy needed some adult time to stay sane, so in the morning I told you that we would be going over to see your godparents, godbrother and godsisters that afternoon after lunch.  You got so excited that at 10am you decided that it was time for lunch. 

You'd been asking for your godsister and your godmummy the whole morning and finally the moment had arrived when at 1pm we got to their house.  Ryder decided that he wasn't going to nap either, so Mommy moved the pack 'n play to the outside patio where we were sitting by the pool.  He was a lot more content there than inside. 

You and your godsister were playing at the other side of the pool and then it happened.  I don't know what exactly, but all I remember was seeing you with big eyes go through the air and fall into the deep end of the pool.  The thing that every mom fears was happening to me.  The thoughts that went through my mind in the seconds it took from leaping in the pool to getting to you were absolutely terrifying.  I don't know why I didn't run around the pool, which in retrospect would have been faster, but this wasn't me acting, it was my intuition and adrenaline combined.

I don't think I ever swam any faster than I did at that moment, but luckily your godmummy got there just before me (she did run around the pool) and pulled you out holding you on one arm.  Similarly to when you were born, the sound of your cry was such a relief.  I had a hard time controlling my emotions as I hugged you and held you.  All I wanted was to hold you and never, ever let you go again.

15 minutes, lots of hugs, kisses, a sippy cup with apple juice and a bowl of goldfish later, you were fine and running around like nothing happened.  I on the other hand was still shaking. 

The rest of the afternoon was spent laughing, playing and wrestling with your godsister and godbrother.  Dinner was great and one of the most beautiful moments of the evening was when I looked through the window and saw your godbrother playing with you and tossing you in the air over the sofa.  The smile on your face was one of a toddler boy who was happy, excited and without any worries.  It warmed my heart and at that moment I knew you were fine.  I am so incredibly grateful:  grateful for you and your brother, for you godmummy pulling you out of the water, for your godbrother playing with you and bringing so much joy to your evening, for the wonderful friends I have who have me over when Daddy is out, for our life in general.  I am very grateful.

When we got home, I first put your brother to bed, while you watched a movie.  Once he was down, it was such a delight to cuddle with you on the sofa and watch a bit more of the movie.  Unfortunately, every time I closed my eyes, the one thing that I saw was you in the water, being under with just an arm coming out of the water trying to find something to grasp on to.  The image terrifies me.  The thought of what could have happened terrifies me.  But what matters, is that you are okay. 

Last night was rough, but I promise that the dreams will go away.  Until then, you just let me know and I will cuddle with you in your little toddler auto bed (which is waaayyyy too small for your 6ft. Mommy) so you can fall asleep. 

My little man, I love you with all my heart.  I wish that I could hold on to you and your brother forever.  To keep anything from happening to you.  It's the Mama-Bear in me as your father would say.  Yet, I know that is impossible to do.  I promise to not become anxious about things, to let you go and allow you to explore, but I can't promise not to worry.  Afterall, I am your Mommy.